the longer i lay here
( 08.13.2003 )
my energy was simply vacuumed out of me. now there's sheet & pillow markings on my skin, but i don't feel any different.
it's been awhile, but i started being critical of myself body again. i hate to even admit it. it makes me feel as though i'm going backwards. & though i was feeling and thinking negative things, i am not right now. i suppose i'm not complaining, but it irks me when feelings are so fleeting like that. "it was probably just hormones" - yeah, i keep repeating that to myself. [honestly, what girl hasn't gotten overly emotional during that time?]
i don't even know what i'm talking about anymore. i just keep going.
oh, sorry. i blanked out - thinking about him.
